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NiqueA911
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Name: Domonique
Location: Detroit
Birthday: 9/11/1986
Gender: Female
Interests: I like to hoop, play soccer, play my flute, sing, go to the movies. I love going to plays and theatrical events. Not anything like "madea shoots your mama" real broadway plays like The Phantom of the Opera, Hairspray or Wicked. I love museums and art. I consider myself a cultured person. Do you?
Occupation: Student
Industry: Other
Message: message me
AIM:  Nique2Nichel
Yahoo:  Domonique_Abner
Member Since:
11/6/2003
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Ok so I been gone for a minute now i'm back with the jumpoff...lol...LETS see whats been going on...
At the end of April my Nana died and as i'm sure you can imagine that was a temendous blow to my family. It was horrible. My Nana and I didn't really have a close relationship until Jade was born, and I value every piece advice she gave me. Whenever I needed someone to talk to, she was right there and not only did she listen to WHATEVER i had to talk about she also gave me some valid feedback. I miss her so much. About three weeks prior to her passing away I kept having this really really really bad feeling. I didnt know what it was, but you know how u just have a feeling like something horrible is about to happen but you just dont know what. To be honest, I thought if it was a death, it was going to be my granny b/c she's 89. But it was my Nana. The morning of the day she passed away my aunt and I had got in a HUGE argument b/c she's a...anyway...and after my aunt left, I went and talked to her about it. She kept saying she didnt feel good, and she asked me to go to the store and get her a newspaper and a vernors. So I did. Then when I came back I gave her the vernors, we talked for a minute and she was still saying how she didnt feel good and then she said that maybe the bad feelings I was having were about her. I just looked at her and I said 'Nana dont say that'. Then I told her I loved her and I went upstairs to my dads. About an hour and a half later, my aunt came home and found her on the couch; she wasnt breathing. My dad went downstairs and tried to revive her until the EMS came. It seemed like forever, but they got there pretty quick now that I think back on. The paramedics were able to revive her on the way to the hospital, but the next 24 hours were the most critical b/c she wasnt able to breath on her own and everytime they tried to take her off the dopamine which was keeping her heart rate up, it went back down, so in essence the machines were keeping alive. Eventually her body just shut down. She went in at about 12am on saturday morning and she died sunday morning at 5:03am. How hard is it to tear yourself away from a hospital knowing your not coming back? Its a hard hard thing especially when its not expected. Not to say that theres a time when you're prepared for death, but you would expect it from and 89 year-old as opposed to a 67 year-old. But i'm here to tell you that you never know when that shit is about to happen, so dont wait til to tomorrow to say or do what you could today. I miss her so much. Words cannot express how much. Whenever I needed someone to talk to about anything, she was always right there. Whenever I needed help with something, whether i needed a ride or money or just to get away from home for a while, she was right there. She's the only one who did shun me when i got pregnant. Irregardless to anything that happened between my parents she remained civil with my mother, which is more than I can say for my dad and my trife aunt. Nonetheless, there's no need to dwell on the past but my point is that I never got the chance to tell her how much she meant to. I tried to show it, but no matter what I could've done it would've never been enough. I took her presence for granted because I thought she would always be there. Silly me for thinking that. But I can't regret, I can only hope she knew ya kno? | | |
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"Listen and don't trip, I think I need a bottle with a genie in it...I'd probably have to check myself into some kind of clinic, I couldn't be alone because without you i'm sick" (thats the best part of the song!)
First Best Friend: Angelika Lewis and Imani Josey, like kg-4
First "Real" Kiss: Well the first guy that thrust his tongue down my throat was James, but my first real kiss with someone I love was guess who...mr. curtis gilmore
First Screen Name: nique2nichel
First Pet: Rico - the cat with four teeth
First Piercing: I have none!!!!!!!!
First Crush: awww Grant Merrit...in kindergarten...
First Music You Remember Hearing: Yea my parents listened to a lot of house music...but the first song I remember being my personal favorite
**7 Lasts...
Last Cigarette: Never
Last alcoholic Drink: on birthday with my boo
Last Car Ride: Taking mr. curtis gilmore back to his apartment
Last Kiss: saturday
Last Movie Seen: Uptown Girls
Last Phone Call: Right now talking to Darius
**6 Have You Ever....
Have You Ever Dated One Of Your Friends? Yes
Have You Ever Broken the Law: Yes I have an unpaid parking ticket right now
Have you ever been arrested: No
Have You Ever Skinny Dipped: No I dont like to swim...
Have You Ever Been on TV: Yes, on the news when I was like 7
**5 Things....
*5 Things You're Wearing: My sleeping scarf, bball shorts, undies, brazier and...o yes my shirt! lol
*5 Things You've Done Today: Woke up, cooked jade some soy bacon and eggs, studied a little, brushed my teeth and brushed jade's teeth
*5 Things You Can't Live Without: My Jade, My Flute, my MAC c-thru lipglass and my education
*5 Things You Do When You're Bored: clean, watch the tele, talk on the phone, surf the web, cook
*5 Places You've Been: France, Chicago, Texas, Florida, New York
*4 favorite things: Jade, Basketball, my MAC c-thru lipgloss and on a good day Curtis G. Gilmore
*3 People You Can Tell *Almost* Anything to: Curtis, Brittany, Jade...lol...
*2 Choices...
1. Black or White: Black
2. Hot or Cold: Cold
*1. Thing You Want to Do Before you die: to live in a lifestyle that I see fit...
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...Its about to get real personal up in here...
"Yeah Just think Just Think
What if you could Just
Just blink your self away..
Just Just wait just pause for a second
Let me plead my case
It's the late 70's Huh
You Seventeen huh
And having me that will ruin everything huh
It's alot of angels waiting on their wings
You see me in your sleep so you cant kill your dreams
300 Dollars thats the price of living what?
Mommy I dont like this clinic
Hopefully you'll make the right decision
And dont go through with the Knife incision
But it's hard to make the right move
When you in high school
How you have to work all day and take night school
Hopping off da bus when the rain is pouring
What you want morning sickness or the sickness of mourning
I'll Always Be a part of you
Trust Your Soul Know it's always true
If I Could Talk I'd Say To You
CAN I LIVE
CAN I LIVE
I'll Always Be a part of you
Trust Your Soul Know it's always true
If I Could Talk I'd Say To You
CAN I LIVE
CAN I LIVE
I am a child of the king
Ain't no need to go fear me
And I see the flowing tears so know that you hear me
When I move in your womb that's me being scary
Cause who knows what my future holds
Yo the truth be told you ain't told a soul
Yo you ain't even showing I'm just 2 months old
Through your clothes try to hide me deny me
Went up 3 sizes
Your pride got you lying saying ain't nothing but a migraine
It ain't surprising you not trying to be in Wic food lines
Your friends will look at you funny but look at you mommy
That's a life inside you look at your tummy
What is becoming ma I am Oprah bound
You can tell he's a star from the Ultrasound
Our Sprits Connected Doors Open Now
Nothing But Love And Respect Thanks For Holding Me Down She Let Me Live...
I'll Always Be a part of you
Trust Your Soul Know it's always true
If I Could Talk I'd Say To You
CAN I LIVE
CAN I LIVE
I'll Always Be apart of you
Trust Your Soul Know it's always true
If I Could Talk I'd Say To You
CAN I LIVE
CAN I LIVE"
O man...this song holds so much damn meaning to me...there are no words to describe it. I am in literal tears right now. this shit so heart wrenching. Just listening to this song takes me back to my pregnancy. I was 17 when I had Jade, and I'm not even going to lie and say I didnt consider having an abortion b/c any woman who goes through something of that magnitude at that young age is probably the hardest choice that will have to be made in their lifetime. Each choice will affect you for the rest of your life, and when u have to decide wether or not to kill something ...well i wont say something, i'll say someone...that came from you and is an expression of love that you shared with the other person even tho it wasnt planned, there comes a time when each individual women has to recognize that everything happens for a reason. If I had gotten an abortion i would've probably had a nervous breakdown. you might laugh but I'm being honest. I couldnt fathom going into a clinic and telling a doctor to suck the child that came from me out of me. Now people dont take that the wrong way, I'm not pro-life and i'm not pro-choice, i'm in the middle i guess. I wouldnt reccomend anyone to get an abortion. But i'm not the one who would be laying down on that table so i cant speak for someone else. I can only speak for myself.
I think back on that time over a year later, and it just makes me sooo emotional. I hid that pregnancy from everyone for 7 months. I betrayed my parents, b/c i repeatedly lied to my mother. I feel so bad about that now, but it was worth it; I have Jade. I just have faith that I will succeed and be a great provider for Jade b/c she deserves the best. There was a statistic thrown at me..."83% of high school teen mothers dont graduate from high school" and that shit pissed me off. I'm not tooting my own horn but I graduated from HS a semester early, and not only that I had all As in 5 classes. Now i'm in college. Its a struggle, but I'm doing it. When I was pregnant and no one knw, I didnt know what I was going to do. I didnt know how my life would turn out. I was scared, but when i first felt Jade move in my stomach, it was then I understood that I have to better myself. There was a time when I was so alone, but I could feel this person inside me talking to me...she was telling me how everything is going to be ok...that might sound corny but its so true. I dont think $300 is worth a life...not at all.
Everyone's so fuckin critical, my friends, my family even Jade's dad talks about me behind my back, but shit thats all their doing: TALKING. I'm doing this by myself. When I want to do something, I have to ask someone and when Curtis cant, my mom cant, my aunt cant, dad cant, I HAVE TO. There will never come a time when I say "I can't do it". I have to. And being there for Jade is what I thrive on. I'm just so happy that God has truly blessed me with Jade. She is the best thing in my life. Everyday I look at her and wonder how did I get to be the lucky one of such a wonderful child. Even tho she's only one, she's my bestfriend, when I cry, she hugs me and vice versa. Its been that way since I was pregnant, we're connected in a way that I can never be connected with someone else.
I'm sorry people, I just had to let that out...that song had me feeling it...ttyl
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| - Got To Be There"Got to be there, got to be there
In the morning
When she says hello to the world
Got to be there, got to be there
Bring her good times
And show her that she’s my girl
Oh what a feeling there’ll be
The moment I know she loves me
’cause when I look in her eyes I realize
I need her sharing her world beside me
So I’ve got to be there
Got to be there in the morning
And welcome her into my world
And show her that she is my girl
When she says, "hello world!"
I need her sharing the world beside me
That’s why I’ve got to be there
Got to be there where love begins
And that’s everywhere she goes
I’ve got to be there so she knows
That when she’s with me, she’s home"
Man o man...I'm tired guys. I'm just tired...i dont know y...mentally i'm tired. i'll be glad when school starts.
Well, i went to the Boyz II Men concert with one of my close friends. IT WAS SO DAMN GOOD. they sang all their signature songs and it was just great. i loved it! i was basking in the ambiance! lol i hope i spelled that right lol.
ok on a serious note people, has something ever happened to you, then you cry yourself to sleep and in the morning when u first wake up, u think it was a dream but then u realize it wasn't. yeah, thats the kind of shit i'm dealing with. I wish he would just fuckin grow the hell up. high school is over let the shit gooooooooooo. grow up man...jeez
ok i'm sick of talking about that negative shit. in other news, i met someone new! o yes exciting! its always nice to meet someone new b/c u get to go through the whole 'get to kno u better/lets spend time together' phase. its sweet. i like it. he's very nice, he has attainable goals and its nice to meet someone who's grounded in reality rather then someone who's thriving off of that childhood dream that is not realistice. whoo! lol, u felt the anger in that shit didnt u? lol...well i'm going to bed now, i'm supposed to go to church tomorrow so i'll ttyl
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| - Try Me
"...So after your heart's been torn in two
And you just don't know what to do
After the rain has come and gone
And the sun still won't shine
After your friends have walked away
And you've run out of words to say
After you've tried everything else
Then try me..."
Well good morning! or afternoon. i feel good today. i went running early this morning cuz i MUST get rid of this baby fatt. lol. its too damn hott. i had some serious down time to think about shit that going on in my life, and i'm just feeling a hell of a lot better. i dont know why. i talked to my dad for once and actually communicated with his ass, thats a first. but he was just telling me that God will never put stuff on you that he knows you cant handle. and whatever doesnt kill ur ass will only make u stronger. so this morning i woke up at 5 and i went to the track and just ran. i had to run a good 2 and half miles. I got back at like 9 and then i was just hoopin. until about 20 minutes ago...and that shit feel so damn good. u have no idea. i guess i find a solace in sweating and running b/c whenever some shit happens to me, that shit makes me feel good. lol...but i'm bout to go soak in a nice lovely bath. i'll talk to u people lata.
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Jade Jordan A.G.
 
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